This last weekend I had planned on going on a "date night" with my husband. Of course anytime you get out of your normal "routine" or "comfort zone" that's when things usually unwind. And yes, that was the case this weekend as well.
I had planned on taking my boys to a place called Kidsquest in the Red Rock Casino here in Las Vegas. They are a daycare type of environment that you can pay hourly to have your kids cared for while you do adult things. I had asked Sean to pick up on Friday the boys' shot records that are required when you bring your kids to this facility. So, the weekend finally arrived and I had noticed a few days prior that Calvin (my youngest - 9 mths) had contracted somewhat of a runny nose and cough. I was worried that he would get worse if we put him in a public environment that he could pick up other germs. Also, the stress of being away from his security blanket "Mommy". So, I was already nervous about that aspect of dropping him off at the Kidsquest.
When Saturday finally arrived I had planned on running some errands during the boys' nap time that are just too difficult and complicated to do with the whole family. These took me a little longer than I wanted because for some reason I was doing everything wrong. Forgetting to use coupons, not remembering receipts, or just taking a wrong turn when I knew the right way to go. I should of known at this point it was not going to be a easy or drama-free evening.
As I arrived home I helped Sean get the boys ready and we were off to what I was hoping was going to be a nice relaxing evening of romance and love. Instead, it was drama-filled and stressing on all levels.
Its hard enough to have to go to the casinos to watch movies and other forms of entertainment that seems the best or easiest due to the fact that the casino pays for these venues. But being surrounded by all the gambling, smoking, drinking and excess lifestyles is very overwhelming for me. I do not appreciate it nor do I ever want to participate in these activities. Having to bring your young children through such an environment is to me even worse. I feel as if I am putting them in harms way inhaling all that smoke and exposing them to all that Vegas is known for. I am thankful on some levels that they are young enough where hopefully they will not remember much when we leave. However, the guilt remains and the burden of this experience of living here remains.
Once we arrived to the casino we found a parking spot and ventured in. We had planned deciding between two different restaurants but wanted to get there to pick in person. Once there we realized one of the two options was a 4 star restaurant (not ideal for bringing two small children into) and the other was closed due to the recession affects. The other options for us were the buffet or the food court. Because we had kids we surrendered to the food court option and proceeded. Once there we realized that there were no tables open for us to sit and eat. Sean had to scour the place going up and down with two kids looking for someone ready to leave. Poor guy. I stood in line behind 5 people waiting to order us all some food as we were all starving at this point. Clayton was unfortunately struggling with his behavior due to the fact he was tired and hungry. Sean and I's stress level was so high at this point we were failing at being as patient as we could of been. There was a point where we both almost started to cry. Ok, maybe Sean just wanted to yell and I was the only one who wanted to cry. Sean looked at me dead in the face and said, "What do you want to do?" I said, "I just wanna go home!" He being my strong brick wall said, "no, let's eat." So, we stayed and pushed through. Thankfully, we ate our supper in somewhat peace. I didn't have to worry about dropping Calvin off because I forgot his shot records. But we did drop off Clayton because they already had him in the system.
We ended up seeing Valentine's Day the movie and it was a good break from a serious and frustrating supper. Although, Calvin didn't want to sit still as much as he had when the last time we brought him to a movie. So Sean and I decided that this would be his last one. :(
I am so thankful in the end though that we stayed for a movie. It was just the break I needed from "chaos".
I tried to be brave and attempt to push myself to do something out of my comfort zone. With all this said, I can certainly say that I have pushed myself in doing something out of my comfort zone in living here in one of the most "liberal" cities in the nation.
Where I come from gambling does exist. Across the river from us. If you want to go there you do. If you don't, you don't. Here its a little harder to avoid.
The good news and the answer to prayer that I've needed is a babysitter. I found a girl at my local gym who really interacted well with my boys. I had noticed that she was patient, kind and more importantly a person of compassion. She gets a long well with all the kids and tries to get to know all of the kids. Some of those working there are a lot more detached. More cold and rigid. Even how they talk to the kids I cringe thinking about how they may be interacting with my sons. The better part of bringing my kids there is that there is a lot of people watching the kids and the good and bad people there balance each other out.
She always is so helpful in holding Calvin while I get Clayton's stuff together and supportive when I have to run after him while trying to juggle the baby. I took the time to ask her if she did private baby sitting. She advised me that she did but that with her college schedule its hard to do too much outside of studying, school and work. Being understanding of her busy life I just asked her to look at the month of March and let me know if she had any openings on the weekend. I was grateful to hear that she had both the first and second Saturday of March open. So, Sean and I will be spoiled and get to go out two weekends in a row. :)
I am counting down the days and when we leave the house those Saturdays I'm going to take a deep breath and look up to the sky and thank God for any amount of private time I get to spend with my husband. Its going to be a great time. I have no idea what were going to do and it doesn't matter. Its going to be "kid-free" and some good one on one time for us to get to reinvest into each other again. Something we havent' done in a long time!!!!
I know its sounds like I'm complaining a lot about living here. And for this I do apologize. Its just so difficult to live so far away from my family and friends. To be away from everything I ever knew since I was a year old to when I was 30 years old. Big culture shock out here for me. Even my other friends who have just moved here two years ago as well have said the same thing. I know as time goes on its going to get easier being away from home. But, I don't think I'll ever enjoy living here. I love the home we bought here and I'll always appreciate the blessing it is to our family. However, I just hope that the next place Sean needs to go that they'll be 4 seasons, great family activites to enjoy, and hopefully more of a "midwest" experience for our kids.
I hope that you all have a great Monday night!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment